Welp, we think it’s obvious.

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dead-0920_616We haven’t posted shit in a long time, and it’s quite obvious that we’re tapped out in the foul-mouthed junk food review department. There are only so many times one can swear about the sweet and salty snacks of the Universe without it sounding like the same shit over and over (see exhibit A: snortramen.com). Even with the role-playing posts, we started scraping the bottom of the barrel for ideas. HamDog and I really don’t like to think too hard if we don’t have to, and it was become just that. But hey, it was certainly fun while it was going and we got to try a bunch of new stuff that we’ve never tried before.

So with that said, what we’re really looking for is someone with a lot of money to stumble across this site. Someone who has a fat bank account and thinks that Snort Ramen is to the Internet as Wayne Gretzky was to hockey. We want you, Mr./Mrs. Moneypants, to drop a bunch of cash and make this shit this website into a comic book, coffee table book, R&B album or whatever the fuck ever. Then pay us royalties and stuff. You could even send us checks or PayPal the fuck out of our accounts just because our posts made you laugh. We’ll even barter… like, for 5 laughs from this site you can send us on an all expense paid 79 day rafting expedition. We also gladly accept vintage Misfits shirts and copious amounts of weed too. All we’re asking is that you simply shower us with lots of money.

It’s been real, folks. Tell your friends about this site until our domain expires in less than a year.

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