We here at Snort Ramen love our metal. It’s energy-driven music that makes you want to wear a sleeveless denim jacket with an oversized Appetite For Destruction patch on the back. Metal makes you bang your head and puts you into an “I have absolutely no fucks to give.” mindset. It’s all about loud amps and intensity… it’s fucking great.
Lemmy Kilmister of Motorhead is appropriately dubbed King Shit of Metal Mountain. If anyone has lived the rock n’ roll lifestyle and then some, it’s Lemmy. Some people even want the dude to be knighted. He’s just that much of a badass.
So what the fuck does Lemmy have to do with potty mouth junk food reviews on the Internet? Well, I recently came across a Cracked article talking about Lemmy’s diet. Apparently this dude is fueled on whiskey, meat, cheese, and drugs. Of course, Cracked is a satire site, but they’re pretty good about dropping references (which we’ll link here and here). But seriously… this makes perfect sense. Why the fuck would Lemmy eat lettuce? You’d never see Lemmy with ice cream. Lemmy is even too badass for Doritos. You probably couldn’t pay Lemmy to eat a Twinkie. No. This motherfucker HAS to be fueled on the charred flesh and congealed juices of animals. But why would Lemmy stop there?! Top that shit off with some Jack Daniels and a few lines off of a stripper’s ass and you have the textbook definition of Grandmaster Metal Motherfucker. And he’s been doing it for 30+ years! AND the dude is healthy as an ox! In fact, he’s never been better. FUCK.
We’d like to take this opportunity to formally induct Lemmy Kilmister into the Snort Ramen Hall of Titan Feasting Fame. We’d like to take this time to tell the world about our signature Lemmy inspired dishes for anyone to enjoy.
- Velveeta Leg of Lamb & Jack Daniels Black
- Bacon Wrapped Duck & Gentlemen Jack
- Cheddar Stuffed Ham Hock & Jim Beam
- Old Crow and Munster Beef Fondue
- Spaghetti & Gorgonzola Stuffed Bison & Maker’s Mark
- Wild Turkey Turkey Stuffed Turkey
“Sittin’ down in a restaurant, Tell the waiter just what you want, Is that the meat, you wanted to eat?, How would you ever know?… Hash browns an’ bacon strips, I love the way that you lick your lips, No fooling, I can see you drooling, Feel the hunger grow…” – Motorhead – Eat The Rich