Posts Categorized: Review

You little motherfuckers...

The Tiny SpaghettiO’s

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You know them all too well… those goddamn tiny rings in a can of SpaghettiO’s. Why the fuck did they make these? Usually they just slide or fall off of your fork, and when you get to the end of your can, they’re a bitch to scoop up. Now I know what you’re thinking: “Well, [...]


White Bread is Stupid

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We here at Snort Ramen are junk food titans. We put a lot of crap into our systems for the sake of flavor. But we’re also not dumbasses and don’t eat EXCLUSIVELY junk food. HamDog and I totally plan on living to be at least 130 years old, and just like anything else enjoyable in [...]

chicken wings

Motherfuckin’ Chicken Wings

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One of the greatest things in life is chicken wings. It’s chicken in sauce. Sure you don’t get as much meat as, let’s say, a turkey leg… but they’re damn fun to eat. There’s two parts to typical wings: the drumette and the wing. The drumette is more dipping friendly, while the wing probably gets [...]

lilys roasted jalapeno humus

Lilly’s Roasted Jalapeno Hummus / The Future of Snort Ramen

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Well holy-ee shit… it’s a post from one of the slacker-ass slackers at Snort Ramen! By now it’s almost certain that you’ve totally forgotten about your old pals/the awesomeness that is HamDog and PlanetoftheCrepes. That’s fine. We have some tricks up our sleeves that will win you back eventually. Maybe. Hopefully. As we mentioned in [...]

spookylicious pop tarts

Pop Tart Power Punch

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Pop Tarts… America’s tastiest breakfast treat that includes 66 ingredients including chemicals, food preservatives, oils and food colorings. Sure these things are loaded with TBHQ, high fructose corn syrup, and hazardous dyes… but goddammit we still love them and will eat them any chance we get. A co-worker at my place of employment gifted us computer-monkeys [...]


J&D’s/The Oatmeal Sriracha Popcorn

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As we mentioned before, HamDog and I are true to the Sriracha Rooster Sauce and have been for quite some time. It’s awesome that The Oatmeal’s Matt Inman has taken it upon himself to tell everyone about the glory that is Sriracha chili sauce… and everyone certainly needs to know about it. This dude writes [...]


Bud Light Platinum

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You know, we try to keep the beer/alcohol reviews here at Snort Ramen to a minimum… seeing that we are a junk food blog after all. But tonight I tried something that I need tell the world about, and that thing is Bug Light Platinum. It was late,  I had rough day, was hungry, wanted [...]

herrs ketchup potato chips

Herr’s Ketchup Potato Chips

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For years I had heard of ketchup flavored potato chips, but never tried them. I think the main reason for not trying them sooner is because I spent most of my life in the South/Mid-South… and apparently ketchup chips belong to the “Great White North Only Club”. But now that I’m in the Mid-West, I [...]

nutella and go

Nutella & Go

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Nutella is great. You can’t go wrong with the phrase “hazelnut chocolate spread”… and if you think differently, then your opinion is wrong and you need your knuckles caned. It’s like the chocolate version of peanut butter (consistency-wise). Although if they ever make peanut butter and chocolate Nutella swirl spread, the sun will split in half [...]

blairs death sauce

Blair’s Death Sauce 4 Pack

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Does your hot sauce come with a motherfuckin’ skull keychain? Mine sure does. There’s a lot of different hot sauces out there. You have the tried and true Mexican restaurant table staples such as Tobasco, Cholula, and Tapatio. Then there are the more “collectible” types like the Ass Kickin’ line, Dave’s, Texas Pete, and Mad [...]


Coca-Cola Freestyle Soda Machine

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Today, lunch consisted of a trip to Burger King. I hadn’t been to BK in a minute, and it’s not the same fast food establishment it used to be. The menus are flat panel tvs, there are hi-res images on the walls of people eating obviously-not-Burger-King food from glass bowls and ceramic ramekins, everything was surprisingly clean, and then [...]

jalapeno poppers

A Salute to Jalapeno Poppers

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One thing we’re big on here at Camp Snort Ramen is experiencing your food. That’s why we’re such huge advocates of spicy food. Sure, eating an entire chocolate bunny in one sitting is awesome and all… but you don’t go around telling folks about “the time I ate a pound of chocolate shaped like a [...]

twix icecream bars

Twix Ice Cream Bars

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One of the world’s most amazing candy bars is the Twix bar. The combination of cookie, caramel, and chocolate… it just reeks of win. It does more than reek of win, it’s crafted entirely of win and wizardry. Twix have stood the test of time and destroy just about any other candy bar that comes [...]

red baron thick pan

Red Baron Thick Pan Personal Pizza – Meat Trio

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Personal pan pizzas are good times. It’s a nice feeling to look down at a pie and just say to yourself, “That pizza is just for me.” There are tons on the market, from the overly-priced Schwann’s personal pizzas to the grocery store DiGiorno deep dish pizzas. Today we’re reviewing the Red Baron Thick Pan [...]


A Salute to Pumpkin Ale

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It’s that time of year again… where the hellish heat of the summer is starting to taper off and the early mornings and evenings are nice and cool. It’s goddamn hoodie weather. And because of this awesome change in the weather, it causes people to drink. There’s nothing better than sitting on your porch with [...]


Book Review: The Sriracha Cookbook by Randy Clemens

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This is the Sriracha Cookbook written by Randy Clemens. It’s a collection of “50 Rooster Sauce Recipes that pack a punch”. Oh fuck yeah! We here at Snort Ramen love our Sriracha, and this book gets our approval. Now we know what you’re thinking… “Oh whatever, guys. I bet you just really like The Oatmeal [...]


White Castle Crispy Jalapeño Cheese Sliders

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It’s been a while since I’ve had White Castle. Every time I drive around the west side of Bloomington and see White Castle, I joke to myself that I’m going to get 20 sliders and knuckle down with no fucks to give. But there’s that part of my gut that reminds me “Dude, you HAVE [...]

zapps spicy cajun crawtators

Zapp’s Spicy Cajun Crawtators

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It is with great pleasure that I share with you today one of my favorite snacks of all time.  I present you with Zapp’s Spicy Cajun Crawtators, the single best potato chip snack on the market.  If you’re unfamiliar with Zapp’s, they are a Louisiana company that started marketing their products with their Cajun heritage.  [...]


Rally’s Big Buford & Fries

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Rally’s is one of the greatest things in the entire world. For those that have never heard of Rally’s, you might be familiar with it’s evil twin Checkers. For those who have heard of neither, Google the closest location right now, get in your goddamn car, and go find one Harold & Kumar style. Rally’s/Checkers [...]


Samuel Adams Bonfire Rauchbier

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Ok, I know our thing here is junk food reviews, but I need to throw in a beer review. My reason for this is because I sometimes feel the need to warn and protect my fellow humans from making dumbass decisions… such as buying any quantity of Samuel Adams Bonfire Rauchbier. Plus, it’s been a [...]

mr goodbar

Mr Goodbar

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That’s right. Mr. Goodbar. I’ll be honest, the name and the packaging for this candy bar have never captivated me. In fact, it’s been a while since I’ve even had a Mr. Goodbar… and when I’d see these things at the convenient store I’d scoff at them. “Pffft!” I’d say to the Mr. Goodbars while [...]

mike and ike

Mike & Ike

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Mike & Ike is a special type of candy. You can get it in large boxes or by the handful from germ ridden vending machines for dirt cheap. It’s the kind of stuff that gives you a quick Dollar Tree-style sugar fix and makes your molars and the spaces between your teeth feel like absolute [...]

green and blacks white chocolate

Green & Black’s White Chocolate

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Look at me, I’m eating all fancy-pants today. I was awarded a white chocolate candy bar from the co-op for tearin’ shit up old-school at my office. It looks like this thing was purchased from Bath & Body Works. But don’t let the wrapper fool you, this candy bar packs a punch. I love white [...]


Milky Way Simply Caramel

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Whooooooooooboy! This sonuvabitch is riiiiiiiiiiich! This candy bar was brought to our attention by our junkfood partner-in-crime Tanya over at Gas Station Gastronomy, and her review can be read here. Based on the picture posted, it appeared to just be a big block of caramel that is coated in chocolate. I love caramel, I love [...]