Posts Categorized: Review

doritos-roulette

Doritos – Roulette

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You know something’s gotta be good if you have to post after abandoning your site for over 8 months. Folks, we come back from the depths to present the Dorito’s Roulette chips. They’re nacho cheese Doritos with the odd hot chip in there. On the packaging we’re just casually warned that “Some chips are very [...]

ghostpepper

The Ghost Pepper

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I question why I’m even bothering with this shit. What has it been… like 8 months since we did an actual post? Eerily enough my timing to make a surprise post is good. Why? Because coincidentally I haven’t even thought about this site in eons since last night, but at the same time (after checking [...]

herrs_horseradish

Herr’s Horseradish and Cheddar Potato Chips

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Sup Ramenites! Long time no see! Things have been rather hectic at the Snort Ramen camp. HamDog has been busy trying to console the entire city of Houston over Matt Shaub, and I’ve been balls deep in the NHL. But we have a review for you today… BEHOLD! I’m here today to talk to you [...]

Snort Ramen

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Word up, Ramenites! Long time no see. HamDog and I have been talking a lot about the site, and we want to share with you guys about what’s been going down. We’re here to announce that Snort Ramen is going to go into the dark for a little while so we can iron out new [...]

carrito de elotes

Vero/Carrito De Elotes

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The fair is in town in my neck of the woods. That means I get to cut loose on all sorts of new and strange fair food that could easily kill me if consumed in large quantities. One of the things we got was a couple of candy grab bags for the kids. Inside one [...]

Pour a Colt45 in your Dorito bag for the ultimate experience.

Doritos Locos Tacos

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You wake up, you scroll through all the gibberish text messages you sent your ex-girlfriend the night before, you face palm for a second… then it hits you. You have to drop a gnarly deuce so bad you now have Gumby legs. You basically slide your Jell-o like body across the floor, walk through walls, [...]

pringles_blazin_buffalo_wing

Pringles Xtreme Buffalo Blazin’ Wing Chips

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Pringles… you gone done fucked up this time. You pulled that shit where you just stared at me when I walked into the gas station… trying to lure me with your lies. You sit there all like “I’m a can of robust spicy wing sauce chips. I’m Xtreme, and I want to party on your [...]

DEFINITELY not the peyote.

Jack Link’s Jalapeno Beef Jerky

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It’s hotter than fuck out here in the Chihuahuan Desert. I’m on the search for the rare Demonio Del Calor Jalapeño Bovine. I don’t know why the fuck I’m even hunting this thing… there’s no way a desert cow could taste remotely good. What could it possibly it eat? Sand, cacti, and scorpions? Goddammit this better [...]

"I'll be ready..."

Mountain Dew Voltage – Raspberry Citrus

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I just picked up this electric blue can of Mountain Dew Voltage and this drink is fucking intimidating.  Just looking at the can made all my teeth grow arms and every single one of them gave me the middle finger simultaneously.  I knew I was getting ready to make a huge mistake.  The label says [...]

drive thru jalapeno cheeseburger

Pierre Drive Thru Jalapeno Cheeseburger

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My biggest hurdle with packing my lunch for work in the morning is pure and simple half-awake laziness. If I have to prepare food, I grumble at every second of the process. I’m a fan of the grab-n-go style foods for lunch… and is probably why every lunch I’ve made in (at least) the last [...]

tacobellbeefycrunch

Taco Bell Beefy Crunch Burrito w/ Flamin’ Hot Fritos

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Shang Tsung watches from his throne as the crowd screams for blood. I, PlanetOfTheCrepes, stand on my side of the screen… feeling the hellish burn of Scorpion’s eyes from across the way. This fucker is about to kill me dead… I know it. I hear some random voice yell “FIGHT!” Who the fuck just said [...]

cracker jackd snack mix spicy pizzeria

Cracker Jack’D Intense Mix – Spicy Pizzeria

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We were somewhere along the interstate when the drugs began to take hold.  Myself along with my attorney and captain, Planet of the Crepes, were busy fighting off the blood sucking bats that kept swooping down over the convertible.  We were trying our best to balance keeping the bats at bay along with driving on [...]

RufflesHoneyMustard

Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Chips

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Stardate 72856.2. We have returned the Starship Chilifries to the Rufflonian exoplanet of the Orion-Cygnus Arm in star system M52. We were hesitant to return after our last failed mission to find awesome snacks, but The United Rufflonian Federation insisted that we come back. According to the Federation, Baconcheddarloadia was a rogue city where the losers win, [...]

private selection buffalo chips

Private Selection Spicy Wings Kettle Chips

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Let’s start with a rant: Chip makers… we need to have a talk. We vote to stop calling chips with Buffalo sauce flavoring anything with the word “wing” in it. If these were supposed to taste like wings, then I would taste some goddamn chicken. I have never tasted chicken in any type of “Buffalo [...]

onionrings

Nong Shim Spicy Onion Rings

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Last weekend the fam made a trek to one of the Asian grocery stores in town. Whenever we go, it is LAW that we get some oddball snack that we’ve never had. So many things from octopus crackers to Sriracha peas… but this time around I opted for a bag of Hot & Spicy Onion [...]

terrys-chocolate-orange

Terry’s Chocolate Orange

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After Willy Wonka (Wilder not Depp, because seriously stop it with the gritty fucking reboots already) killed all those kids in his candy funhouse of horrors and swindled Charlie into signing a confession (it’s in the fine print)… he fled to Florida where the cheap laborers have no chance of unionizing like those bastard Oompa [...]

circus peanuts

Fuck Circus Peanuts

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Folks, if you’ve ever face planted into a box of slightly moist styrofoam that sat in a banana distribution center for half a decade and inhaled said styrofoam… then you know what a circus peanut tastes like. Even by our standards, this candy is an abomination to the junk food world. It’s nothing like a [...]

Morille

Morel Madness

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Sup Ramen readers! Today’s post isn’t actually junk food, but it’s one of the greatest foods around for many good reasons. For those of you who live in the Midwest and Northeast region of ‘Merica… you’re probably familiar with almighty morel mushroom. For those in areas where morels don’t grow, I must tell you that [...]

behemoth

The Behemoth Burger

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Hol-ee shit! Now THIS is 100% pure Snort Ramen material! What you see here is the goddamn Behemoth Burger made by the Grilll ‘Em All foodtruck… aka greatest food truck idea ever. If it hasn’t clicked up in your skull walnut yet, it’s a heavy metal themed food truck out in LA that rocks burgers such [...]

bacon ranch chicken

Eckrich Bacon Lovers Bacon Ranch Flavored Chicken Breast

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It was that time of the week again, and that meant picking out lunch meat for work lunches. Mrs. PotC came home from the grocery store and gifted me with a package of lunch meat labeled “BACON RANCH CHCKN”. Well, shit yeah! This stuff is rather tasty (yes, it tastes like bacon and ranch) and [...]

twangerz

Twangerz

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I was in Texas last week, and before I left, my wife asked me to find some Twang flavored salt to bring home. I had forgotten about this stuff, and she was right… you can’t find that stuff in Indiana. After a little bit of searching I finally found some at a convenience store and [...]

magicmiddles

Retro-Feast: Keebler Magic Middles

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Ah yes… Magic Middles. Remember how in the commercials everyone just couldn’t fucking believe how the Keebler elves got the chocolate in the middle? Those were the good ol’ days. For those of you who were born too late, Magic Middles were  soft cookies with creamy fudge in the middle. It was like a chocolate [...]

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Braunschweiger (liverwurst)

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Today is the day where I’ll probably gross out everyone who reads this blog. Folks, braunschweiger (or liverwurst) is the bee’s knees. It’s delicious spreadable meat and it’s great. Many people will get their panties in a wad just over the smell, and those people will die in the Great Bear War of 2016. I [...]

new lays

New Lay’s Chip Flavors Mega Review

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Sup, minions. PlanetoftheCrepes here with the almighty Hamdog to review the 3 new Lay’s potato chip flavors. Two days ago we gone done told you about these hitting the shelves, and today Hamdog and I got our grubby mits on each type. I was able to score the Siracha and Cheesy Garlic Bread chips, while [...]

rallys fry lovers burger

Rally’s Fry Lover Burger

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If you frequent Snort Ramen, you know we love our Rally’s. Goddamn do we love our Rally’s. The burgers/sandwiches are aces because they’re large, generous with the fixins, and cheap. And the fries are mouthgasmic. You can read about me going apeshit over Rally’s in one our previous articles here. Recently we talked about chips [...]